Fossilized politics


“All major theme parks have delays. When they opened Disneyland in 1956, nothing worked! Yeah, but John, if The Pirates of the Caribbean breaks down, the pirates don’t eat the tourists.”
From “Jurassic Park”

After years of watching politicians I can only conclude that the most prolific dinosaur alive today elected to any office is the Taxosaurus. That’s not good news for the taxpayers that end up paying the government’s bills.

And if that isn’t bad enough, the Spendasaurus has often crossbred with the Taxosaurus which has created the Supersaurus (just for kicks, that’s a real dinosaur), which will go out of its way to create more laws to collect even larger sums of money from the people.

I got the idea of giving politicians fictitious names of dinosaurs years ago, but if one watches a lot of politics, it should be easy enough to see why I think many of them are dinosaurs. That’s especially true inĀ  especially true in Washington, where many have been around since the Jurassic Age when the super-continent Pangaea began to tear apart. Just look at what’s happening to politics in our country today.

During the Windham Town Council meeting of Feb. 28, the Windham town manager just happened to mention to the town councilors how to shorten the meetings even more by just voting on the so-called consent agenda items instead of reading each one. What the councilors used to do was read each of the consent agenda items and then have one vote to cover all of them. If a councilor objected on one, then that would be voted on by itself. It might seem like I am an Irritator dinosaur (actually existed) but I love an open and honest government. I would think that it would make better sense to shorten the wording on each agenda item to something like, Johnny Jones for the Planning Board, Jo Smo’s liquor license, etc., so that the Payasauri (taxpayers) have a clue what the Gasosauri (they pass things) elected to office really do.

I decided to check on the Windham town manager’s interpretation of the Town of Windham Council Rules of Procedure. That sounds pretty cut and dry except we humans can interpret things differently even though it’s in black and white. Here’s what the council rules actually state. “A motion made to approve the consent agenda shall be considered a motion for each and every item on the consent agenda and a waiver of full reading otherwise required by Section 7 of these Rules and a vote to approve the consent agenda shall be a vote to approve each and every item on the consent agenda.”

What I see is a lack of what “full reading” really means. If the town councilors stick with the town manager’s interpretation of Council Rules many citizens who only watch Channel 7 council meetings won’t have a clue as to what the Windham town councilors just voted on. It has been said birds descended from dinosaurs, so I guess that just might make the average citizen feel like an Ostrich with its head stuck in the sand.

Back to dinosaurs, there is the Pachycephalosaurus that is elected and reelected to office. Those dinosaurs did exist millions of years ago and the scientific name actually means thick-headed lizard. It is more than evident that many survived only to be elected to office over and over again. They are so out of touch with reality that they seem to only listen to their leaders, the Apatosaurus (the deceptive lizard). It’s either that, or millions of voters have become disenfranchised with those dinosaurs holding office, which would more than likely make us seem like Barney and Friends. We also have the Nannyosaurus types elected to office which believe that we are not capable of making sound decisions so they like to make them for us. If one hasn’t had enough of dinosaurs, we still have the Parksosaurus (it’s a real name) which loves creating parks, and if one combines them with the Pawpawosaurus we will have many dog parks to pay for as well.

Lane Hiltunen of Windham wants become an Astronautosaurus because he was good at taking up space in school.